Usually I play Street Fighter early on in the day, when my brother is in school and I'm not being criticized, "Dude you should've done you're ultra. That was a terrible loss. Do your ultra. Why do you keep block, stop blocking," and what have you. He's actually very good, adapts well to whatever is thrown at him at any given moment. Playing it this time of day was strange because there were a whole of straight up noobs playing right now, you know, people with lives. I'm not saying I'm the king of fucking Street Fighter, I'm aight, as the kids say. I don't know how to drive stick shift, but I can lay down a swift, brutal beatdown. One of my cousins cried because I beat them in Street Fighter so hardcore way back when, I was 10 he was 12. It's just that I've been playing Street Fighter for almost 15 years. Jesus Christ on a unicycle. Thanks to online play I don't have to limit myself to playing against my brother, occasionally people who come over, and the drinking team plus whatever random drunks at Goldie's. Goldies + Street Fighter 2 = <3. Seriously, you don't even know. Sometimes I see dudes let themselves lose to some cute girl or whatever and it sickens me, I will try my best to shatter your dreams of victory no matter who you are. I've played people online that have crushed me as if I was a tiny ant and they monster trucks, savage whippings that have left me dazed. That's cool though. I don't take it personal. I'm not one of those people who quit midway through a bout because I'm losing, I hate that. These are the characters I use in Street Fighter IV: Vega, the stabbiest stabber to stab you in the face; Fei Long, because Bruce Lee lives within all of our hearts; Sakura, I like it when I whip some doof using some uber macho character like Akuma with a 14 year old girl; Balrog, to punch them till they love me, but I paraphrase.
How did I end up wearing my snake boots, blue tartan boxers, and a black hoodie in my basement? I suppose my glasses and socks count. Yes socks, I'm not some kind of hillbilly. My dad said told me to go to the shop tomorrow. I told him I had to go to parking ticket court, since I refuse to part with any money without given the bastards a run for their money. He said something like, "godamnit." I said something like, "Chill Daddy-o, I'll just go to the shop after." He said, "Alright fine. But come in work clothes." I said, "Right on." But then I realized I don't have any clean clothes that I'm willing to wear while cutting cars in half or whatever, thus I went to do some laundry. While I was tossing in some jeans I'm not fond off into the washer I said to myself, "ah what the hell I'm going to have to wash this stuff soon anyway," and took off my pants. Then I said, why stop there? So I tossed in the shirt I was wearing. Not the hoodie though because I just washed it, as well to carry the stuff I had in the pockets of whatever pocketed articles of clothing I threw in the wash (i found a dollar!). As I was standing there half naked, in awesome boots, watching the washing machine lumber into life I thought, "This is probably a fetish."
Komodo Dragons Kill Indonesian Fisherman. What the fuck. My favorite part of the story is, "In June last year, a group of divers who were stranded on an island in the national park -- the dragons' only natural habitat -- had to fend off several attacks from the reptiles before they were rescued." I imagine it's those kinds of stories that populated pulp magazines back in the day! The
In other horrible animal news:
Aquarists at the Blue Reef Aquarium in Newquay have discovered the identity of a mysterious killer that had been devastating their coral reef display over recent months. This... monster is four feet long. Shudder. I can't not look at it! Stuff like this is why I fear the ocean.
1 comment:
Pier of life. LOLZ.
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